This song, the David Lee Roth version, dancing about my head for the last few days for some odd reason.
Going about my normal routine this morning…showering, brushing teeth and shaving. Well, must admit, the shaving is actually an odd thing. Something about the men in my family, but we do not grow facial hair that quickly. There is talk of another Movember push this year and the company I now work for did a promotion to raise money with it last year…it fucking took me ten years to get my goatee to where I like it and there is no way I am shaving it off now.
The goatee actually came as a result of Peter Gabriel’s Secret World Tour…no joke. I thought he looked so cool in it, I decided to grow one. Not at first, mind you, but I started around 2000 and it has remained for most of the time since. With a previous job, when I had to occasionally visit oil refineries and there were rules about no facial hair due to gas mask safety…I shaved it once or twice and then remembered how I look too young without it.
With this new job, there is a bit of added irony. In just about a month with the new firm, I am already the grizzled vet on the sales team…at least inside. We have a couple of guys outside that are closer in age to me…or slightly older. The manager of inside sales, for example, is almost 20 years younger than I am. The other two guys are not much older…so on simple age I am the senior there by at least 15 years. On experience in the sales world…these three had probably just started elementary school, if that, when I had my first industrial sales position…and no, it did not involve missionary nor doggy style.
I am serving this account. This customer needs service
– George Carlin
I’m too old to feel this damned young, I tell ya. These guys are starting to reinvigorate me.
It is a bit of a laugh when I figure that these guys were still in diapers when I was already an *ahem* expert at cunilingus. Need more practice, I admit, as I feel I have lost my touch being so single…but all in good time.
Really, though, where cunilingus is concerned, can one truly be an expert? I have heard so many guys claim to be. To those men, I offer a quote from the almighty Jack Sparrow…
You need to find yourself a girl, mate.
Go find a woman. Shut the fuck up and go practice more. If you were an expert, you wouldn’t be telling us because the women wouldn’t let you off the bed.
Now…I’m sorry, I got side tracked here, didn’t I? What the hell was I saying?
Ah fuck it…off to work. See y’all soon.