Every morning, the cock rises and announces its presence.

In its natural habitat, it stands tall and proud for all to see.  It looks at the world as though the world were its plaything.  It surveys all as something for it to use.

The cock is near god-like in its attitude.

Then it gets cold.

The beaver is the cock’s friend.

Unlike the cock, the beaver stays hidden in the morning, and keeps warm.  It remains curled up and toasty, awaiting the inevitable.  If left alone, the beaver will remain in this state, protected by its dam, and stay warm.  It can go entire generations without food and, though not happy about it, it will claim to have wanted it that way and come out with sensationalist statements such as:

Cocks are over rated.

Cocks are jerks!

I don’t need a cock!

The cock, on the other hand, has no such delusions.  There are many cases of cocks, the ones that stay away from beavers, shriveling up and falling off their perch.  Thus, unlike the beaver that runs on delusion, the cock is driven by desperation to the point of idiocy.

Suffice to say, the cock and beaver have a symbiotic relationship.

When a cock finds a beaver’s dam, it immediately gains confidence and even feels the warmth to come.  It fights its way past the dam until it gets to the beaver.

The beaver, as expected, pretends to initially be uninterested in the cock’s presence.  The beaver begins asking questions such as:

Where were you when I needed you?

Who’s boots were those?

Who is the blonde in the photos sucking on you?

The cock, however, can only offer one simple, pathetic answer:

I’m cold.

Sooner or later, the beaver will take pity on the cock.  In an amazing display, it will open its mouth and allow the cock to stick its head and neck inside to be warmed.

Cocks, unfortunately, are prone to confusion here.  They immediately push their head in and then pull out, then in, then out…over and over again.  They love the damp wetness in the beaver’s mouth and do not think they deserve it, thus constantly sliding almost out before thrusting back in as deep as they can due to feeling the cold upon their neck again.

Depending on how well the beaver knows the cock will cause the beaver to ask the next question:

Why aren’t you wearing a hood?

If the beaver knows the cock well, it knows it will keep it warm and happy.  If the beaver does not know the cock, however…there are fears of homeless cocks wrecking havoc due to being too cold and ruining beavers with their desperation…this plus the beaver feels self conscious and does not want to look at the cock, thus the theory being that a hood would help the cock calm and not quite as cold when it cannot find a beaver.

So what does the beaver get out of this relationship?  It gets fed.

The cock keeps a warm white liquid in its own mouth.  It hides it in its feet and then spits it out in near volcanic fashion once it has been warmed enough by the beaver.  The beaver than eats the warm juice and, though doing it happily, usually complaining that the cock spit too fast.

Unfortunately, if the cock is wearing a hood, the beaver will not get fed as the hood blocks the white liquid.  Beavers tend to only eat from cocks they know well.  This is all a bit awkward as the cock tends to feel uncomfortable, wet and selfish…it wanted to feed the beaver.

Regardless, warmed and happy, the cock withdraws from the beaver’s mouth.  The beaver, if fed, does tend to drool and may go in search of tissues or somewhere to bathe.  The cock becomes fat and happy…assuming the hood is taken off and it cleans itself as well.

As these friends in nature go their separate ways, the beaver can always be heard to make one final wish before parting…

Call me…

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