Truth’s Bluff

Truth is a comedian that often wears a cloak of fact to deceive. It likes to bluff in this game of life.

The fact is that truth is about belief, bias, perception, and decision. Fact, itself, rarely influences truth.

I’ve tweeted that more than once, but as you can see, it is seven years since the last time. I used hashtags that were not necessary to the point, but they were (and still are) my truth.

We atheists are often very good at covering our truth with a wallpaper of facts, legitimate or not. Funny, in that it is a similar tactic to those that push religious dogma. I’ve don’t this, myself.

Below is a gorgeous tune by Don Henley that I’ve searched for a video or a longer form of the song, but can’t find. Very much a heavy American reference to it, but if you can get past that, there is a strong message beyond.

One line stuck out the first time I heard it. Knowing Mr. Henley is a stickler for copyright, it makes me a bit nervous sharing this much of a quote, but I feel I must in order to get the point across.

My grandson, he comes home from college
He says, “We get the government we
My son-in-law just shakes his head and says,
“That little punk, he never had to serve.”

Don Henley – A Month of Sundays

There’s a lot of truth to unpack here, but very little fact…and I hate cliches (truth), so I use “unpack” with an eye roll (fact).

The father’s truth is about judgment based upon military service or, in this case, lack thereof. Indeed, those of us growing up in North America in the 80s did not have to serve. The fact, however, is that those in military service have saved us from that requirement through their sacrifices. A further fact is that the father’s service has given his son a right to free speech and thought.

The son, however, his truth is something else.

“I gotta be me!”

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His truth is free speech, and anyone that might hurt be damned. Free speech is a beautiful thing, but so many express it without accepting responsibility for what it causes. The song does not go further, but I’m making the assumption the son would allow his inner-narcissist to be offended if the father called him on the statement. Luckily, most of us emerge from the narcissist bubble as we mature.

Narcissists unite!…mind you, narcissists don’t need each other for anything. They do need victims, though. Especially those that find truth in playing the victim card.

These two truths, the self-identified victim and the narcissist meet head-on and feed each other. Without someone to dismiss, a narcissist is nothing…and without someone to hurt them, what is a victim?

One might extrapolate this to the idea of dom and sub…and you thought I wasn’t going to get to sex, didn’t you? Not going to suggest doms are narcissists nor that subs are victims, but it is a similar relationship when you step back and observe those that consent to it.

And there is the context issue. This is about those that choose, those that consent to use victimhood as their cloak of truth.

The fact is, most do not choose this cloak but end up feeding the narcissist anyway. With the dom/sub relationship, this is about consent. With the narcissist/victim relationship, this is about choice.

Narcissists can create victims who did not choose to be such. Then, when someone plays that victim card, it feeds the narcissist’s truth and allows them to dismiss it. The fact that a legitimate victim was dismissed and then plays a further victim card gets them labeled as needy…a further dismissal.

This also can work the other way, with those choosing victimhood creating phantom narcissists.

Where the dom/sub relationship is concerned, this creating might be considered in the realm of assault or even rape. In this world of “owning our own shit,” however, we have accepted it as part of the game.

So I ask you, who created Black Lives Matter?

We did through our own racism and historical attempts to dominate a group many of us consider to be a visible minority. Those seeing the group as needy and as people who have chosen to be victims need a serious history lesson. Well, likely, they need more than a history lesson as I’m not sure it will work without context of actually experiencing the history and culture that is still is being used under the claim of tradition.

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The fact is that I am white. The truth is that I know I have “white privilege” to a large degree of which I have yet to understand. Part of the white problem is that we want them to stop guilting us (victim) without us having to stop shaming them (narcissist).

Shame is the truth of what we believe. Guilt is driven by the facts of actions we have taken.

Racism is a choice to accept things as truth without facts. Race is not a choice…it is a fact.

So yes…time to call truth’s bluff.

Time to stop blaming the victims we have shamed for making us feel guilty when, the fact is, we did it to ourselves by relying too much on truth.


  1. well said my brother. I feel so many have taken liberty with the certain point of view truth. Yes that is true as long as you look at it from this direction. You are correct, truth is not always just the facts but also the persons ideals mixed with it.

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